React to “No” Like a Kid

Be honest… do you hesitate reaching out to someone, or asking for the sale because of the fear of hearing “no.”

Many coaches limit their income, and deprive people of the opportunity to have their life changed because of their “no” fear.

So, I suggest you treat “no’s” like you did when you were a kid.

The Snack Cake Kid

In the grocery checkout line the other day, a little boy bounced over to his mom with package of snack cakes and displayed it to her with an outstretched arm, smiling mischievously.

“We’re not getting that,” mom mumbled, barely glancing up from the Cosmo she was leafing through.

“I want it though.”

“No,” mom said, still thumbing through the magazine.

The kid ignored her and threw it in the grocery basket with the other items.

Mom put the magazine back in the rack, then began unloading her items onto the counter.

Including the cakes.

If you have or had kids, or hang out with people who have them, or can remember when you were one yourself, you have experienced how expertly kids handle “no’s.”

Think about it. Kids react to no’s as if they are temporarily hearing-impaired.

They ignore the no’s.

They feel as if their parents don’t really mean it.

They treat no’s as a mild inconvenience. As a press of the “Pause” button before they get what they want.

They know they might have to ask multiple times.

They know more often than not that their parents will cave in.

If they don’t get what they want now, they’ll come back later and ask again.

They will ask in different ways after a no.

Instead of triggering despair in their emotions, the no signals the next attempt at asking for what they want.

So why do adults in sales look at no as rejection?

Why do we treat no like touching a hot flame, getting painfully burned, scarred, and quickly retreating from and avoiding the source?

“No” Doesn’t Always Mean “No”

I had the opportunity to attend a fundraising dinner as part of a celebrity golf tournament for Arizona youth baseball. During the dinner, kids were working the crowd selling raffle tickets. I had already purchased five $20 tickets earlier at the door, and a young lady (fourth grade as I found out) approached our table and very confidently asked,

“Would you like to buy some raffle tickets?”

I smiled and said, “Oh, thanks, but I already bought some.”

Without missing a beat she smiled back and replied, “That’s OK.”

Not sure what to say, I forced my smile and repeated, “Ok.”

Without hesitation she said, “Yeah, that’s OK. You just haven’t got one from me yet. Buy another one from me.”

So then I owned another one. What else could I do?

Don’t misunderstand, I am NOT suggesting that when you hear a no you become indignant and get confrontational. Not at all. I’m simply suggesting you look at a no as something that happened.

Stuff happens.

In order to get clients, you need to be in the game. And if you’re in the game swinging the bat, you’re going to miss occasionally. You have to be swinging in order to get some hits. Missing is not rejection. Not trying is much worse than an perception of what you might call rejection.

Action Step

Very simple, yet powerful action step for you: think about any situation where a kid gets a no, and model their technique for responding. Be curious, ask questions, see if you can salvage anything from the situation, plant a seed to keep the door open, and move on to the next opportunity with the satisfaction of knowing at least you tried.

Attach more pain to the outcome of not trying, of missing out on a possible great client, of not at least providing the option of an opportunity for someone to change their life, than to that fear you might have formerly had of hearing a simple “no.”

(If you enjoy these tips, would you please help spread the word? Please post this in the online health coach groups and communities you participate in,  and forward it to your colleagues. Thanks in advance!)

Will you please share with other coaches? Thanks!
Art Sobczak

For over 30 years Art has helped sales pros say the right things to get more appointments, clients, and sales in virtually all industries. He's speaker, trainer, coach, and best-selling author, and now working to help health, wellness, and fitness coaches and trainers help more people. Contact him at Art@HealthCoach.Training or (480)699-0958.

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